Speak Mercy

Two years ago today, I got up very early and drug two amazing friends with me down the interstate that would take me to the small town of West Monroe, Louisiana. Who goes there, I know. In fact I wanted to turn around immediately. Little did I know what was in store for me. What I did know was that when I walked through the doors of this nursing home looking house I was going to make sure they knew who I was. I was tough and they were not going to make me weak. They also were not going to “convert” me! I fondly remember talking of this day with other girls in the home who told me they were scared of me! Success! Seems like just yesterday yet was so long ago.

More than the fun and not so fun times at that house with those girls and women, I think back over the two years since then. Sounds crazy to read but it is even crazier to think that I have a God that not only pursued me when I denied He existed and when I fought everything He did to try to save me, but that He continues to pursue me with the same intensity. I do not always realize that but how beautiful. He loves me and pursues me with no restraint. Imagine if we lived like we knew that.

This new year brought two years of new life. At the strike of midnight, January 1, 2001, it was two years since I cut, drank, smoked, was inappropriate with boys, used drugs or participated in eating disorder behaviors. I looked everywhere only to know now that the answer and comfort I sought could only be found in God!

The first thing God did since that day was break me and my heart. I said I would not even “consider letting them convert me” until I had been there at least a month. Well, ten days later on January 18, 2009 that resolve was shattered. And it started with a question of me trusting God with everything for only 24 hours. I love it because God knew what I needed. It may be unconventional but it worked and now, not only am I alive but I will leave this earth one day – with God’s timing NOT mine – to spend eternity in heaven. Pardon the excitement but I think we tend to take these things too lightly! Since then I have seen breakthroughs, provision and healing in amazing ways that I could have never imagined, and He is nowhere near stopping! Whoo Hoo! I am so blessed and don’t even realize it. It took twenty five years for me to get all the way to the bottom of my slimy pit and in two years I am amazed what God has done. In the words of a Mercy girl’s BFF, “I am not where I want to be but thank God I am not where I used to be!” (Joyce Meyer)

So as I look back over these two years I don’t remember the tough and excruciating times so much but I see the many blessings and times God has stood next to me or even held me up. I also see the many people God has placed in my life in various ways that have helped me hold my arms up when I could not do it anymore or given me that breath of fresh air that I needed to keep moving forward. I say thank you to God and to those people. I know I am not always the easiest to put up with but know that you have treasures in heaven and are priceless treasures to me!